DISCLAIMER: This post is purely opinion and is based on personal experiences. In no way is this meant to tear down the purpose and good that BYU-I has done in so many lives. It's a good education at an affordable price. I'm grateful for the tithe payers and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for making getting a college education easier at a reasonable cost. If you are absolutely in love with the University, then don't read this. I'm going to be 100% honest because this is a review post. You will get offended lol. This is all based on my experience and how they have behaved with me.
When you are applying for college, you don't really know what you are getting into. Each campus has a culture, a way of doing things and the environment that the University creates. I wish that I had a blog post that I could have read before I came up to BYU-Idaho telling me what it was like and giving me a heads up so I could prepare myself. Just a little background on me: I'm a Junior majoring in International Studies. I've taken both all online classes, on campus classes and a mixture of both. I've been single, dating, engaged and married as a student. I've worked part time and gone to school full-time since I started my college education. I've done it all! Here are some things I wish someone told me before going to BYU-I
1. Religion is mixed and mingled with your secular education. Professors relate the class curriculum to gospel principles and compare truths. Depending on your preferences, you may be the kind of person that doesn't want a church or religious bias in your education. You are graded if you do or do not read your scriptures in your Book of Mormon class and you loose your Ecclesiastical Endorsement if you don't go to church. This could be a good thing and it could be a bad thing. If you don't like being forced activity in the church, then maybe you should consider another school. Keep in mind that this is a private Mormon University so they have a lot of freedoms with combining religion and education.
2. There is no student life. It is a really small town, in a family community, in the middle of nowhere. The population 27,094 and over 14,000 of those people are college students. There are no major stores like Target. They just barely got a normal sized Walmart this past year. The only activities I have heard about are stake dances which are EXACTLY like the ones you attended in high school. The activities put on by the University are religious seminars as well. There are no frats or sororities or week events like in other colleges. There are no sports teams and the only University events are religious seminars. You have a midnight curfew, except on Fridays where you have to be in your apartment by 1 am. There are a couple of hikes or you can drive to another city to do something. The closest mall is 40 minutes away. I come from a big city and so Rexburg is very dull to me. Keep in mind that there's not much of student life and stuff to do in the actual city. It's tiny.
3. Expect a culture that you have never experienced before and nothing can compare to it. BYU-I is a little bubble in the middle of nowhere. Students and faculty over the last decade have created their own little world. There is no diversity other than a handful of foreign students from other countries. Dating and marriage will be brought up every class period and pounded into your brain until you're married or graduated. Devotionals somehow become a requirement for exaltation. I respect and understand the Honor Code but I don't see how having a beard or wearing shorts on campus is going to stop you from being a better disciple and student. This, in my opinion, cause the faculty and students to have a "holier than thou" attitudes. Can I just bring up that mustaches are okay? I feel like a well groomed beard is way more professional then having the young men walk around looking like Pedo-Pete with the caterpillar over their top lip. Roommates have to make sure that each other is living the Honor Code so that can make things SO awkward. You either feel like you're being judged or your mom if you have to keep getting on them. If you don't like adding rules on top of the commandments of the gospel, then another University would be more for you. Keep in mind that BYU-I has implemented its own rules and culture.
4. Basically everything is student ran. Want support and advice on what to do for an internship? A student will help you with that. Want to pick classes and know what to take for your degree? Your councilor is actually a fellow student. Want to know who's processing and handling your financial aid and scholarships? Some 18 or 19 year old student. My husband had a TA as a tutor who had no previous tutoring experience or a desire to even be a tutor. He hates tutoring now. There hasn't been a single semester where the financial aid office has gotten it right and they are super hard to get a hold of. This semester over 50% of the student body didn't have their financial aid before payment deadlines. They have cut pmajor and minors without telling students. The international department sent my husband's visa paperwork 10 days late and have lost his visa twice. Rexburg is too small to try and support 14,000 college students. There are NO jobs so the university has to make up for it. I appreciate that they provide more jobs on campus but I would like a trained professional to handle my money or my husband's legal documents. The intentions are there but the application is not efficient or professional. At times I have felt that I'm attending an activity organized by a YSA ward than an accredited University. Keep in mind that every department is ran by a student just like you.
BYU-Idaho is a great place to be. I have had amazing experiences with quality professors who I felt I could trust and confide in. If you have a chance, take World Foundations 101 from Ms. Gee. She is awesome! Even though I would rather do this on my own, I love that the university teaches that your education is a tool in being a better disciple leader and that all knowledge testifies of the Plan of Salvation. I have had some amazing roommates who have become my dearest friends and taught me many valuable life lessons. The purpose and intention of the University is there but the application and efficiency is lacking. The culture, the state of Idaho and BYU-I just wasn't my cup of tea! I suggest that you do a lot of research and actually visit the campus. Ask students how they feel about their experience so far. Good luck on your search for your college education! I hope this article proves useful!
Friday, June 23, 2017
Monday, June 12, 2017
"You Don't Have to Be Perfect to Be Worthy"
I work at a call center and when we start to run out of people to call or it gets slow, coworkers discuss a lot of things. Sometimes we vent about the job and the rude people on the phone or the frustration we have with the financial aid office at BYU-I, but today it was different. We actually talked about some deep stuff! Since I study and work in Rexburg, Idaho, 98% of the population is LDS and since it's a college town most of my coworkers are my age. A majority of the meaningful discussions we have are actually about the gospel and our own personal journeys to where we ended up that day.
Today we had a long discussion about how we knew if we made the right choice or if we are leading a life God wants us to live. Some of it was whether it was going on a mission, marrying the right eternal companion or what major you decided to pick. There was something that I noticed about each story that we all had in common. We were all waiting to have the perfect answer and we felt like we weren't receiving it because we weren't perfect or our situation wasn't the ideal. I feel like this is more common than just within the LDS employees at a calling agency. It's a church wide mentality and I noticed that it was a driving force in why a lot of the inactive members I taught on my mission lost their way. No matter what they did, they felt like it was never to be good enough. It makes sense because our doctrine teaches that perfection is in fact a goal and there is always something that we can improve on. In no way am I dissing on this doctrine or disagreeing with it, I think it is a marvelous goal. As a natural reaction though, being human and imperfect, we may all feel as though we have to obtain perfection in order to earn what we want or what God wants for us.
This is something that I struggle with and I think it's something that I taught myself on my mission. You know we are always told that you have to be an obedient missionary in order to see miracles or get a baptism. I always felt that the cancelled baptism from an investigator or a less active not showing up to church was because I wasn't a perfect missionary that transfer. Looking back I realize that it was their agency and I did try my very best to follow all the rules I needed to follow. One thing I failed to learn on my mission was even though I could be 100% perfect in all I do, life will never be be perfect. I mean look at Our Savior Jesus Christ. He did absolutely everything He could. He WAS and IS the only perfect being to ever come to this earth and life for him ended in betrayal. It ended in lashings and being hung on a cross. But because He was obedient AND the Son of God, He also rose in glory the third day, being the first ever to do so.
The point of this post is to tell you that your best is good enough, although not perfect, it is good enough for the Savior and for our Heavenly Father. Some days you won't have the desire to go to church. Some days it will be a struggle for you to read your scriptures because of a busy schedule. Sometimes you will have doubts and your testimony will shake. Sometimes you won't always make the best decisions. AND THAT'S OKAY, because it is part of being human. If we never had those instances, what would be the point of coming to earth? I always thought that if I made one wrong move or if I didn't feel like going to 9 am church, that God would make me pay for it later. I thought that if I didn't make the right decision every time, it threw me off the path that God had for me and I was doomed to live a miserable life and pay for my actions every day for the rest of my life. That is not the nature of God and if you feel like that, it's Satan making you feel that way.
There are 3 things that I have learned to do when I start to feel this way:
1. Learn the acronym CPR. Every return missionary seems to know that when your church attendance, prayer and your habit in reading the scriptures is consistent, you feel good. I would also add temple attendance to endowed members. Focus on the small and simple things. The thing I struggled with is coming home from my mission and not being able to study for 3 or 4 hours in the morning and because of that, I felt I was sinning. I felt guilty. I learned that it's quality not quantity. As a missionary I was able to study for that long because of my schedule but once I started working and going to school, it just wasn't realistic. As long as you feel the spirit and it's quality time with the Lord, whether praying or reading the scriptures, it's enough for Him. You and Him both know what your best is. Figure out what that means to you in your situation. I find that when we do these simple things, other gospel principles like service and missionary experiences, will find its way into our lives. Everything just falls into place.
2. Don't compare your discipleship to another's. Every situation is different and people make different choices. We are all trying our best to follow Jesus Christ and it varies in appearance. It has been a mistake of mine to compare my decisions to those of others. I view myself as "not worthy" of gospel blessings because I don't go to the temple as much as so and so or go to Tuesday devotionals like so and so or do the same things as so and so in order to keep the Sabbath Day holy. My mission president once said that comparison is a sign of pride. You either compare yourself to see if you are better than another or you compare to tear yourself down. Both are destructive and are not God's plan. Focus on your situation and what discipleship looks like for you. Do a self-assessment every once and while to check if you can do anything to improve. We can always do a little better but don't set too many goals tow here you are overwhelmed. If you pray to God to know what to focus on, He will tell you what He sees as important for you.
3. You don't have to be perfect to be worthy. The Savior in the Book of Mormon states, "I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men..." (Ether 12:27) Jesus Christ is the one who actually gave us our weaknesses. He knows us perfectly and knows what we want. God isn't going to say "Oh well because you failed to read you scriptures on September 16, 2012, you can't marry Tyrone Mather even though you love him very much" or "Man, you didn't have the perfect attitude when you went to church 10 years ago so you won't get that job you've wanted for forever." That's just not His nature. God loves you and so does Jesus Christ. They love you so much and want you to be happy. They want you to marry your best friend, they want you to get the career of your dreams and they most importantly want you to return to His presence. You do not have to be perfect for them to want those things for you. You do not have to be perfect to be worthy of God's love. He loves you no matter what you do and will help you make things right if you make a decision that does't make you happy.
Today we had a long discussion about how we knew if we made the right choice or if we are leading a life God wants us to live. Some of it was whether it was going on a mission, marrying the right eternal companion or what major you decided to pick. There was something that I noticed about each story that we all had in common. We were all waiting to have the perfect answer and we felt like we weren't receiving it because we weren't perfect or our situation wasn't the ideal. I feel like this is more common than just within the LDS employees at a calling agency. It's a church wide mentality and I noticed that it was a driving force in why a lot of the inactive members I taught on my mission lost their way. No matter what they did, they felt like it was never to be good enough. It makes sense because our doctrine teaches that perfection is in fact a goal and there is always something that we can improve on. In no way am I dissing on this doctrine or disagreeing with it, I think it is a marvelous goal. As a natural reaction though, being human and imperfect, we may all feel as though we have to obtain perfection in order to earn what we want or what God wants for us.
This is something that I struggle with and I think it's something that I taught myself on my mission. You know we are always told that you have to be an obedient missionary in order to see miracles or get a baptism. I always felt that the cancelled baptism from an investigator or a less active not showing up to church was because I wasn't a perfect missionary that transfer. Looking back I realize that it was their agency and I did try my very best to follow all the rules I needed to follow. One thing I failed to learn on my mission was even though I could be 100% perfect in all I do, life will never be be perfect. I mean look at Our Savior Jesus Christ. He did absolutely everything He could. He WAS and IS the only perfect being to ever come to this earth and life for him ended in betrayal. It ended in lashings and being hung on a cross. But because He was obedient AND the Son of God, He also rose in glory the third day, being the first ever to do so.
The point of this post is to tell you that your best is good enough, although not perfect, it is good enough for the Savior and for our Heavenly Father. Some days you won't have the desire to go to church. Some days it will be a struggle for you to read your scriptures because of a busy schedule. Sometimes you will have doubts and your testimony will shake. Sometimes you won't always make the best decisions. AND THAT'S OKAY, because it is part of being human. If we never had those instances, what would be the point of coming to earth? I always thought that if I made one wrong move or if I didn't feel like going to 9 am church, that God would make me pay for it later. I thought that if I didn't make the right decision every time, it threw me off the path that God had for me and I was doomed to live a miserable life and pay for my actions every day for the rest of my life. That is not the nature of God and if you feel like that, it's Satan making you feel that way.
There are 3 things that I have learned to do when I start to feel this way:
1. Learn the acronym CPR. Every return missionary seems to know that when your church attendance, prayer and your habit in reading the scriptures is consistent, you feel good. I would also add temple attendance to endowed members. Focus on the small and simple things. The thing I struggled with is coming home from my mission and not being able to study for 3 or 4 hours in the morning and because of that, I felt I was sinning. I felt guilty. I learned that it's quality not quantity. As a missionary I was able to study for that long because of my schedule but once I started working and going to school, it just wasn't realistic. As long as you feel the spirit and it's quality time with the Lord, whether praying or reading the scriptures, it's enough for Him. You and Him both know what your best is. Figure out what that means to you in your situation. I find that when we do these simple things, other gospel principles like service and missionary experiences, will find its way into our lives. Everything just falls into place.
2. Don't compare your discipleship to another's. Every situation is different and people make different choices. We are all trying our best to follow Jesus Christ and it varies in appearance. It has been a mistake of mine to compare my decisions to those of others. I view myself as "not worthy" of gospel blessings because I don't go to the temple as much as so and so or go to Tuesday devotionals like so and so or do the same things as so and so in order to keep the Sabbath Day holy. My mission president once said that comparison is a sign of pride. You either compare yourself to see if you are better than another or you compare to tear yourself down. Both are destructive and are not God's plan. Focus on your situation and what discipleship looks like for you. Do a self-assessment every once and while to check if you can do anything to improve. We can always do a little better but don't set too many goals tow here you are overwhelmed. If you pray to God to know what to focus on, He will tell you what He sees as important for you.
3. You don't have to be perfect to be worthy. The Savior in the Book of Mormon states, "I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men..." (Ether 12:27) Jesus Christ is the one who actually gave us our weaknesses. He knows us perfectly and knows what we want. God isn't going to say "Oh well because you failed to read you scriptures on September 16, 2012, you can't marry Tyrone Mather even though you love him very much" or "Man, you didn't have the perfect attitude when you went to church 10 years ago so you won't get that job you've wanted for forever." That's just not His nature. God loves you and so does Jesus Christ. They love you so much and want you to be happy. They want you to marry your best friend, they want you to get the career of your dreams and they most importantly want you to return to His presence. You do not have to be perfect for them to want those things for you. You do not have to be perfect to be worthy of God's love. He loves you no matter what you do and will help you make things right if you make a decision that does't make you happy.
1 Nephi 17:13 says, "And I will also be your light in the wilderness; and I will prepare the way before you, if it so be that ye shall keep my commandments; wherefore, inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments ye shall be led towards the promised land; and ye shall know that it is by me that ye are led." Before when I read this, I would have thought that God already had a step by step plan for me that would be laid out for me to figure out and if I messed up, I failed the plan. That I had a set decisions that I had to make that God already planned for me to make and if I varied from that plan, He would punish me. Now I see that this "theory" is wrong. What I have learned is that God is with us every step of the way making decisions with us. When we mess up He says, "That's part of the plan too. Rely on my Son Jesus Christ to repent and feel better. Let's move on from here and let's see how you can be happy." He makes the best out of our weaknesses. He makes our mistakes beautiful. He allows us to make our own decisions in order to be happy and we can know that as long as we are keeping the commandments, we are always going to be happy. We are always going to be living a life that He would want us to lead. We will never be perfect in this life but we will always be worthy.
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