New Hair Cut!

Decided to chop it all off! 10 inches later and I'm loving it!

Chastened Even In Righteousness

" 27 And I have been supported under trials and troubles of every kind, yea, and in all manner of afflictions; yea, God has delivered me from prison, and from bonds, and from death; yea, and I do put my trust in him, and he will still deliver me." Alma 36:27

Why do good things happen to bad people? Why would God let this happen? Where are you God? Uhhh... Hello?

Heavenly Father has always given us a choice. Since before this life He has always let us choose what we want and it's because He loves us. This is called free agency and even Satan has the power to choose. Satan chooses to tempt us to sin or make hurtful decisions. We choose if we want to give into temptation or follow God's commandments. With free agency God knew that all of us would sooner or later make mistakes that would make life miserable for the rest of His children. Can you relate? When one child is in a bad mood it seems as though he can't leave his brothers and sisters alone! Taking that into consideration Heavenly Father asked "Whom shall I send?" Our loving eldest brother Jesus Christ said "I will Father! Send me." Heavenly Father already knew the impact of our decisions and that some of those would hurt our brothers and sisters. It was the consequence to having free agency. In order to uphold His promise of free agency He can not take away someone else's agency to stop bad things from happening. That would diminish the purpose of this life. So He sent His son, to not only Atone for the sins of the world, but create a person wherein men can lay their burdens and feel the peace of the pure love of Christ. Our Savior is the only person who knows exactly what each person is going through. The hurt, the guilt, the pain, the loneliness. He has suffered, bled and died so that He can take you in His arms and say "I understand and I am with you every step of the way." In order for ALL men to come unto Christ we ALL have to go through trials and learn from them. Even when we are righteous we tend to drift away from the Savior and through trials, no matter by other's free agency or by Heavenly Father's will, we rely on our Savior. What about the little boy with cancer? He didn't choose it for himself and neither did anyone else. Our teacher in Sunday school told us a lesson about an inactive family. The littlest boy out of the children was diagnosed with Leukemia. When that happened all the children that left came home, the older brother stopped smoking, the older sister left the boyfriend who had influenced her in very negative ways and they all started coming to church again. They were all sitting around the bed when the little boy passed away. A year later they were all sealed in the temple along with their little boy and brother. Sometimes terrible things happen to the righteous so that many other souls can be brought to salvation. Now the older brother is preparing to serve a mission and the family is still actively going to church. Just because bad things happen, doesn't mean that our Heavenly Father doesn't love us. In fact He chastens those He loves. Although we may want to be loved a little less sometimes(haha), He does it because he wants us to be the best we can be, return to Him and know true happiness.

Learning this aspect of the gospel has strengthened my testimony in so many ways. I was actually going to change this post to my testimony of the Savior. It seems as though everything I write circles back to Jesus Christ. It is just another testament to me that Jesus lives and He loves each and every single one of us! This is His true and everlasting gospel! Our Father in Heaven loves and knows each and every one of us and because of that love He created the Plan of Salvation! I love my Heavenly Father and eldest brother Jesus Christ. I say these things in His name. Amen.

Molly Mormon

Today in church, as we were waiting for the lesson to start, a mother shared stories about her daughter that really touched my heart! Her daughter loves the gospel and lives the principles that she is taught. As a result other kids her age call her "Molly Mormon" and she is put down because she has strong morals and sticks to them. She also mentioned that these peers teasing her include some members of the church and attend seminary with her. This article goes out to the Molly Mormons!

I want to start by thanking you. You are the diamond in the rough, the light in the darkness and the example of the believers. Although it may seem like nobody appreciates your courage and strength right now, I guarantee that someday someone will! One day you will be going about your daily life and you'll get a text or call thanking you for your example. When I fell away from the church I was one of those who teased the "Molly Mormons" and I lost my best friend because of it. Once I returned to the church, I thanked her and continue to thank her for the example that she set for me, even when I was a terrible friend. Because of women like you I made it back to the gospel. More importantly your Heavenly Father and Savior appreciate your efforts to be the best that you can be. I cannot put into words how proud they are of you!

Keep it up! Before I fell away, I was always teased and bullied for being a stuck up Mormon. I must admit at times I was! But even when I wasn't I was still seen as judgmental and it always hurt my feelings. It was one of the contributing factors for making the terrible decisions I made because I wanted to prove that I could be a "cool Mormon". THERE IS NO SUCH THING! You cannot be of the world and still expect your testimony to remain strong. It's impossible. Elaine S. Dalton once said "No amount of peer pressure, no acceptance, no popularity is worth a compromise." Do not fear man more than you fear God. Satan will do anything in his power to try and keep you from being the woman your Heavenly Father wants and NEEDS you to be. You are doing great! If you have made a mistake that's okay! Nobody is perfect. My bishop once told me "Only the righteous repent." Do whatever you need to do to be that "Molly Mormon" again! You Heavenly Father needs you and your courage!

To that amazing young woman I heard about in church today and to all the righteous young women out there, thank you! You cannot begin to comprehend the lives you have changed already due to your exemplary character, bravery and strength! I am so proud of you and most importantly your Heavenly Father and eldest brother Jesus Christ is! I love you with all my heart and soul!

XOXO, Madison

Meet Olivia.

Since I talk about Olivia a lot I thought I would post some pics of us! We are DORKS!

 I used to call her black Dora when she had this hair cut! Hahaha! (ABOVE)

Forgiveness

I had a hard time starting this post. The reason being is that I have yet to learn true forgiveness. If you have not read my post "My Life Story" then you should read it first before reading this post. When Olivia passed away the man who hit her died on the scene as well and I never got to meet him. How do you forgive someone who has taken so much and is not even here to see the damage that he caused? How do you forgive someone who is here on this Earth, knows the pain they have inflicted and does not give care in the world? How do you forgive someone who you once loved but they hurt you instead of returning that love? How do you forgive someone who continues to hurt you over and over again? Here are some things I learned about forgiveness..

- Let the person know how you are feeling and do not let it fester! Sometimes people do things that hurt you without really realizing it and their intentions were never to cause pain. I've done that to plenty of people. Once they know how you feel take a deep breath and move on from there. This has saved me many times.

- Forgiveness is not about hearing a sorry. For the longest time I wanted to hear "I'm sorry". The person who hurt you is on a different level then you. Maybe they are ahead or maybe they are behind in the forgiveness process. You never know what is going through their head and they're probably not ready to apologize for what they did. Forgiveness is a choice and only yours to make.

- The ability to forgive has everything to do with what is happening on the inside. The way you talk, think and act towards them. Whenever I was around somebody that hurt me my goal was to try and not think anything negative about them. Of course I was never ever at anytime perfect at this but when you learn to control your thoughts your actions always follow.

- Remember that NO ONE is perfect. It's impossible. We all make bad choices and they never affect just ourselves. Think of a time when you hurt somebody and instead of holding it against you they welcomed you with love and support. Wouldn't you want to be that person? Whenever I get hurt and want to be angry I think of my dad. I mess up so many times and it always has an affect on him. No matter what he always forgives without boundaries and loves without condition.

- Do not rush it. As much as we want to rush things and get it over with we can't with forgiveness. Forgiveness takes time and it takes constant trial and error. It is not perfect. One day you will feel like you are completely over it and the next day it's like it happened 2 seconds ago. It is a process.

- I watch this video every so often when I feel like I can never forgive. It's about 8 minutes long but those 8 minutes will change your life. I was shown this video following Olivia's death and it helped a lot! He is such a phenomenal example of forgiveness.(http://www.lds.org/media-library/video/mormon-messages/mormon-messages-2010?lang=eng&start=13&end=24#2010-07-14-forgiveness-my-burden-was-made-light)

- Look at them through the Savior's eyes. Jesus Christ loves each and everyone of us, knows us by name and died because of that love so that we can return to our Heavenly Father. He is the PERFECT example of forgiveness and we should all follow. Christ looks at us for who we are and for what we have potential to become. Every person is a puzzle and we do not have all the puzzle pieces nor do we need them to forgive. Our loving eldest Brother and Savior made up for all of our mistakes. All he asks in return is that we try our best and keep in mind that everyone else is doing the same thing.

- Lay your burdens at your Savior's feet. He is the only who knows the whole story and exactly how you feel about it. The Atonement did not confiscate for just sin but any hurt that was also cause by that. The guilt, the pain, the loneliness and the anger. All of it. Pray to your Savior and Heavenly Father. They are there to help no matter what!

Women and Rubies

"Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies." Proverbs 31:10

Rubies are the rarest gems on Earth and so are you!

As women, one of our biggest challenges that we have is how we view ourselves. We live in a world where the degrading of women is constant and all around us! In ads, music, television and all other forms of media we see women hardly dressed, treated like objects and yet at the same time, expected to be perfect in every single way. We can all agree that it is hard to feel and be a confident and righteous young woman while still feeling beautiful. YOU AS A WOMAN NEED TO HEAR THIS!

1. Be proud that you are a woman! In order to recognize how truly awesome that is you must first learn what it means to be a woman. You are a Daughter of a King with divine heritage because you are a child of God. Through the Atonement and Jesus Christ you can become like your Father in Heaven. Remember that you have divine qualities and have limitless potential! Understand how God feels about you. He loves you, knows you personally and wants you home with Him! No one else has what you have to offer and you can change the world because the world needs someone like you! Your intellect, style, life story and who you are is unique! No one else compares! "You are, as James E. Talmage once phrased it, “a sanctified investiture which none shall dare profane.” Take a moment to say out loud or write what it is and feels like to be you. Get to know yourself! I strongly suggest listening to a talk by Jeffrey R. Holland addressed to women. (http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2005/10/to-young-women?lang=eng)

2. Stop nitpicking! There are times where I just sit there and pick and pick, whether it's pimples, hair and the little bit of fat I have on my body. Those days are usually the days where I have a bad day. Now don't take this as never look in the mirror because that is not what I am trying to say. Instead look at yourself through the Savior's eyes. It's okay to look in the mirror and say "I've gained some weight I need to work out and loose it" but don't sit there and say "Ugh, I'm so fat and that makes me ugly". That does no good. When I get ready I say 5 things about myself that I like about myself that day. It is okay to get frustrated and it is okay to love yourself. Love yourself for your flaws and work towards being a better you. 

3. Stop comparing. You are your only competition when it comes to self. You are the only one who has exactly gone through what you have and it is unfair to compare yourself to other women. Each body is different inside and out. Also I always hear women in my life talking about and comparing themselves to how they looked in high school. Knock it off! That little high school body didn't have kids and gone through life the way your body has now. Your body is even more beautiful now than it ever was! Work out, take care of your body and feel great! Be the best you!

"19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?

20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."

-1 Corinthians 6:19-20

4. Be modest. Boy do I struggle with this one! I wear bikinis and have terrible language and in the long run it has damaging effects. Modesty is always in fashion. If you look at timeless beauties like Audrey Hepburn you see that they didn't need to show off a lot of skin to be viewed as beautiful. Choose your clothes like you would choose your friends. Would you choose someone who will embarrass you and degrade you as your best friend? No and you should choose your clothes the same way. The only time I was ever embarrassed was when I was immodest. When Princeton male students participated in a study comparing reactions to modesty and immodesty they concludes that when males view women who are immodest, they view them as if they were object rather than people. Modesty isn't just about appearance. It is also the way we talk. Watch this video on modesty and it will completely change your point of view! Promise!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJVHRJbgLz8 

Every single woman is beautiful and has something to offer that the world is in desperate need of! I hope this post helped you whatever you stood in need of. Let me know what topic you would like me to post about next! 

XOXO Madi

HAPPY 4TH!

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!

To the Parents

There are some things that I wish my step-parents and parents would have done differently. Keep in mind that all that my parents did was out of love and they always had my best interest in mind. Here are some guidelines that can help the kid as they work through the divorce, visitation and all that comes along with separation.

1. Do not talk ill about your ex-spouse in front of your kids. Divorce is hard for everyone and hurtful things can be said. As a kid you believe everything that your parents say because they are your hero and in your eyes mommy and daddy are perfect. Even though you no longer have a relationship with your ex-spouse, your child does.

2. Do not discuss visitation or child support with your children. They do not need to know the legal and communication details with the other parent. That is for adult ears only! Countless times legal matters would be brought up in front of me and being a child I did not know when it was appropriate to talk about them. Sometimes it would affect the relationship I had with that parent who was being discussed and I had no knowledge of the whole story. I only knew what was taken out of context.

3. Whether you like it or not the person you decided to have your child with will always be one of his/her parent. The child will develop different relationships with each parent but always make it priority to let the child decide on what kind of relationship that they want with the other parent. It is no use trying to taint or diminish your child's relationship with your ex-spouse. Instead focus on your relationship with your child. I always admired my dad for making it a priority to leave the decision up to me.

4. The three words "I love you." can never be over used. I grew up knowing that no matter the choices my parents made it was out of love. Raising a child with a divorce or separation is a team effort with co-parenting and compromise.

I hope that these four tips help!

Mistakes I Made Through My Parents Divorce.

Divorce is never fun for anyone especially the kids and it seems to be happening more and more. During my parents divorce I wish I had someone to give me advice and help me through all the rough patches. Here are somethings to keep in mind that will help you through your parents divorce...

1. DON'T BLAME YOURSELF! Sometimes people fall in and out of love. Things happen to where they can no longer be married anymore. When my mom left, I thought that it was because I didn't do my chores or I talked back too much. Keep in mind that your relationships with each individual parent is separate from the relationship your parents have with each other.

2. Just because they are divorced, it doesn't mean that they don't love you. Your parents will always love you and want what is best for you! Whether they are a step parent or a biological parent. They contributed to your life and in return you have contributed to their lives in some way. Divorce does not end the love they have for you.

3. It's okay to be frustrated! I held a lot of what I felt in and didn't talk about it until it blew up in my face. Your parents want to know how you are feeling and help you with those feelings. If you are not comfortable talking about the divorce to a parent, go to someone who has no part in the situation, like a friend or adult figure that you trust.

4. Blaming one parent or the other isn't going to solve anything either. There are two people in a relationship and it takes two to make it work. Both contributed to the problem and both could have the contributed to the solution. The fact of the matter is, nobody is perfect and people make decisions. You can't control their actions but you can control yours. Instead of being angry like I was, try loving them through it. It's hard for them to and they are feeling pretty lonely right now. Help each other through it! You'll be happier in the end.

5. Last thing to do which should probably do first and through out the divorce is to just breathe. Things fall apart so bigger and better things can fall into place. It's going to be ok! It won't be easy but in the end I know it will be worth it.

My Life Story

     Life is never perfect and let me tell you, life made that known! I was born to Jeff and Amber Ritter on December 29, 1994 on my dad's birthday! How cool right?! Homeboy hasn't had a birthday in 18 years! Poor guy! 2 years later my brother, Jackson, came along and we have been inseparable ever since. Shortly after Jack was born my parents got a divorce and it took til the summer before my Senior year in High School to completely forgive my mom for leaving and making some of the decisions she made. In 2000 my dad remarried to Nicoya Huntsman who raised me. Through out the years there was broken promises and misunderstanding between me and my mom Amber. Sometimes she would promise things and something else in life would come up and she couldn't afford to fly us out or drive to come get us for visitation. It made me feel like my mom didn't want me and it hurt every birthday or Christmas when I didn't get a card or package from my mom. At times it would be years where I didn't see my mom and I thought it was because she didn't love me. Later I realized that it wasn't for that reason at all! My childhood was filled with happiness and joy!
     It wasn't always heartbreak. I was a daddy's girl who played sports with the boys, believed in Santa til 6th grade and was raised in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or as the world calls us, Mormon. You could say that my dad and step-mom tried their best to raise me in the ideal family, making up for a almost always undependable mother (due to her circumstances and misunderstanding not by choice) and they did a very good job. My Sophomore my best friend ,and mother figure Melissa, had a baby girl and named her Brooklynne Madison. I will always a better woman for Brookie! Melissa will forever be the one of the contributing examples and reasons for me still being in the church! Also that year my dad and step-mom began to have marriage issues and the summer before my Junior year my step-mom left. Again, I felt abandoned and alone. Why will no one stay?! I blamed myself and for a while a blamed my dad. Both a mistake. I was never the same after that and became depressed. I lost a lot of weight due to lack of sleep and the fact that my dad had no idea how to cook! Hahaha! He did his best trying to raise 2 teenagers by himself and he did an awesome job! To help with my depression I turned to the church and I was better! Let me just say, now I cringe at pizza rolls, Ramon and T.V dinners. My Junior I got asked to prom by the guy I liked and we became a thing. It was really weird but we were definitely talking exclusively and were not seeing other people. I really liked him and ultimately became my first kiss! AWE ;)

     The summer before my Senior year was the darkest time of my life. On May 21, 2012 Olivia Monet Wilson died in a head on car collision due to a drunk driver. She was getting off the freeway and the other guy mistook it for an on-ramp. They both died on the scene. Olivia was my best friend and sister. We would talk about being in each other's weddings and having our babies together. We met my freshman year at volleyball tryouts, she had hit me in face with a ball during a drill and we were Ebony and Ivory ever since! We went to the mall one time and saw these two necklaces at Forever 21, one was a locket and one was a key. I got the key and she said "No matter what we will always have the key to each other's hearts." After Olivia's death I became somebody I thought I'd never see myself become. Following her funeral, I once again became depressed but instead of turning to God and my Savior Jesus Christ for help, I turned to other means. I got a tattoo and to distract, I put myself in dangerous situations that could have ended very badly. I can't remember half of that summer due to being under the influence and am lucky I am here today. I lost who I was. Meanwhile my dad gets remarried and my new step-mom is pregnant with a baby girl while I'm dealing with a break up due to his unfaithfulness. It was as if everything was happening all at once. I felt replaced, disgustingly changed and utterly alone. I had lost all faith in the church and at one time didn't want anything to do with God. It took a good 6 months for me to wake up and realize how selfish and foolish I was being. It wasn't until I had met this Mormon boy who made me realize that what I wanted out of my life was not attainable with the decisions I was making. I fell head over heels in love with him and thought he was the one. So silly looking back on it now! I went through the repentance process and by March of 2013 I was temple worthy and ready to take the sacrament again! When I was finally getting my junk together, life through another fast ball. The Mormon boy I had fallen in love with Dear Jane'd me through a Facebook post kissing his now fiance and never talked to me again. Crazy right?!
      I graduated with good grades and a bright future. I now talk to all my mothers (LOL) and am still trying to find myself once again. I miss Olivia everyday but I know I will see her again! If there is one thing I have learned in my 18 years on this earth is that nobody is perfect and trials and tribulation do not discriminate. BUT, if you rely on your Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ they will pull you through. Life is not all tears and hearts breaking. In fact most of it is smiles and giggles but it seems to be the negative that the human habit seems to focus on. No matter how far gone you are, you can always return to Christ, who in return, will be waiting for you with open arms! Looking back I regret a lot of things but it is important not to dwell on those regrets and instead move forward wiser! I am now currently preparing for a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (turn in my papers September 29!) and have become a better person as a result to my past. I love my God and my Savior! I am a college student, an athlete, a daughter and sister, a friend and now a blogger! I AM A MORMON!

A Blog With a Mission!

Hello everybody and welcome to the blog of Madison Ritter! Never have I ever thought of starting a blog but here I am! My blog is here for a purpose and that's to help others through life and hopefully inspire at least one person out there on the big and spacious internet. If I knew what I know now earlier, my life would be a lot easier. They say someone who is smart learns from their own mistakes but the wise learn from others. I may get tons of views or may not but my goal is to have at least one person learn from my mistakes and better their own life. So get the word out about my blog and lets change the world one post at a time!