My Life Story

     Life is never perfect and let me tell you, life made that known! I was born to Jeff and Amber Ritter on December 29, 1994 on my dad's birthday! How cool right?! Homeboy hasn't had a birthday in 18 years! Poor guy! 2 years later my brother, Jackson, came along and we have been inseparable ever since. Shortly after Jack was born my parents got a divorce and it took til the summer before my Senior year in High School to completely forgive my mom for leaving and making some of the decisions she made. In 2000 my dad remarried to Nicoya Huntsman who raised me. Through out the years there was broken promises and misunderstanding between me and my mom Amber. Sometimes she would promise things and something else in life would come up and she couldn't afford to fly us out or drive to come get us for visitation. It made me feel like my mom didn't want me and it hurt every birthday or Christmas when I didn't get a card or package from my mom. At times it would be years where I didn't see my mom and I thought it was because she didn't love me. Later I realized that it wasn't for that reason at all! My childhood was filled with happiness and joy!
     It wasn't always heartbreak. I was a daddy's girl who played sports with the boys, believed in Santa til 6th grade and was raised in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or as the world calls us, Mormon. You could say that my dad and step-mom tried their best to raise me in the ideal family, making up for a almost always undependable mother (due to her circumstances and misunderstanding not by choice) and they did a very good job. My Sophomore my best friend ,and mother figure Melissa, had a baby girl and named her Brooklynne Madison. I will always a better woman for Brookie! Melissa will forever be the one of the contributing examples and reasons for me still being in the church! Also that year my dad and step-mom began to have marriage issues and the summer before my Junior year my step-mom left. Again, I felt abandoned and alone. Why will no one stay?! I blamed myself and for a while a blamed my dad. Both a mistake. I was never the same after that and became depressed. I lost a lot of weight due to lack of sleep and the fact that my dad had no idea how to cook! Hahaha! He did his best trying to raise 2 teenagers by himself and he did an awesome job! To help with my depression I turned to the church and I was better! Let me just say, now I cringe at pizza rolls, Ramon and T.V dinners. My Junior I got asked to prom by the guy I liked and we became a thing. It was really weird but we were definitely talking exclusively and were not seeing other people. I really liked him and ultimately became my first kiss! AWE ;)

     The summer before my Senior year was the darkest time of my life. On May 21, 2012 Olivia Monet Wilson died in a head on car collision due to a drunk driver. She was getting off the freeway and the other guy mistook it for an on-ramp. They both died on the scene. Olivia was my best friend and sister. We would talk about being in each other's weddings and having our babies together. We met my freshman year at volleyball tryouts, she had hit me in face with a ball during a drill and we were Ebony and Ivory ever since! We went to the mall one time and saw these two necklaces at Forever 21, one was a locket and one was a key. I got the key and she said "No matter what we will always have the key to each other's hearts." After Olivia's death I became somebody I thought I'd never see myself become. Following her funeral, I once again became depressed but instead of turning to God and my Savior Jesus Christ for help, I turned to other means. I got a tattoo and to distract, I put myself in dangerous situations that could have ended very badly. I can't remember half of that summer due to being under the influence and am lucky I am here today. I lost who I was. Meanwhile my dad gets remarried and my new step-mom is pregnant with a baby girl while I'm dealing with a break up due to his unfaithfulness. It was as if everything was happening all at once. I felt replaced, disgustingly changed and utterly alone. I had lost all faith in the church and at one time didn't want anything to do with God. It took a good 6 months for me to wake up and realize how selfish and foolish I was being. It wasn't until I had met this Mormon boy who made me realize that what I wanted out of my life was not attainable with the decisions I was making. I fell head over heels in love with him and thought he was the one. So silly looking back on it now! I went through the repentance process and by March of 2013 I was temple worthy and ready to take the sacrament again! When I was finally getting my junk together, life through another fast ball. The Mormon boy I had fallen in love with Dear Jane'd me through a Facebook post kissing his now fiance and never talked to me again. Crazy right?!
      I graduated with good grades and a bright future. I now talk to all my mothers (LOL) and am still trying to find myself once again. I miss Olivia everyday but I know I will see her again! If there is one thing I have learned in my 18 years on this earth is that nobody is perfect and trials and tribulation do not discriminate. BUT, if you rely on your Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ they will pull you through. Life is not all tears and hearts breaking. In fact most of it is smiles and giggles but it seems to be the negative that the human habit seems to focus on. No matter how far gone you are, you can always return to Christ, who in return, will be waiting for you with open arms! Looking back I regret a lot of things but it is important not to dwell on those regrets and instead move forward wiser! I am now currently preparing for a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (turn in my papers September 29!) and have become a better person as a result to my past. I love my God and my Savior! I am a college student, an athlete, a daughter and sister, a friend and now a blogger! I AM A MORMON!